


Don't Call Me Baby Again | LS

by mysweethabit



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Cell Phones, Conversations, Cute, Dialogue, Falling In Love, Fluff, Friendship, Harry Styles Loves Louis Tomlinson, Humor, LGBTQ Character, Larry Stylinson Is Real, Louis Tomlinson Loves Harry Styles, Love, M/M, Phone Calls, Romance, Soulmates, Soulmates Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Strangers, Text Messages, True Love, larry stylinson - Freeform, soft
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-13 02:00:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29768976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mysweethabit/pseuds/mysweethabit
Summary: In which a boy finds his phone number written on a bathroom stall of the only gay bar in town and decides to call him. There's the start of a dazzling relationship.*****"So, are you going to help me?""And why should I help a complete stranger?""Because the bathroom stall says that if you have any kind of problem, then call at this number. They will help you. Like some sort of therapy, you know? And bathroom stalls never lie, baby.""Primo, I'm going to kill Payno. Secundo, if you need someone to talk with, then go get an actual therapist. Tertio, don't fucking call me baby again."//A Larry Stylinson AU Fanfiction\\
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

**Harry in bold.** _ Louis in italic.  _

*****

_ "Hello?" _

**"Is this Louis?"**

_ "Yeah. Erm... who's this?" _

**"Well, Louis, here it says to keep your name confidential, so I won't say my name."**

_ "Where?" _

**"On the bathroom stall of the only gay bar in this town."**

_ "I- what the fuck?" _

**"So, are you going to help me?"**

_ "And why should I help a complete stranger?" _

**"Because the bathroom stall says that if you have any kind of problem, then call at this number. They will help you. Like some sort of therapy, you know? And bathroom stalls never lie, baby."**

_ "Primo, I'm going to kill Payno. Secundo, if you need someone to talk with, then go get an actual therapist. Tertio, don't fucking call me baby again." _

**"Alright, chill out. Who's Payno?"**

_ "He's my best friend who's soon going to get killed by me." _

**"Ouuu. Can I join?"**

_ "No, you cannot. Stay in your bathroom stall, stranger." _

**"Dammit, I would've loved to witness a real life murder. Anyways, can you help me? It's kind of urgent."**

_ "Are you dying?" _

**"Erm... no."**

_ "Then, it's not urgent. Goodbye, stranger." _

**"Wait. Please, help me."**

_ "Okay, fine. How can I help you, stranger?" _

**"Do you know how to get rid of a boner?"**

_ "What the fuck? Do I look like I know?" _

**"Well, I can't see you."**

_ "Unbelievable! Go home and take a fucking cold shower and never call me again on this number." _

**"Well, I thought of going home and taking a cold shower, but I don't want to. Do you have any other solutions, Louis?"**

_ "..." _

**"Did you just hang up on me?"**


	2. Chapter 2

_ "Hello?" _

**"Hi, Louis."**

_ "What the fuck, stranger? I told you to never call me again." _

**"Well, I was feeling a bit lonely and wanted to talk with someone."**

_ "Don't you have friends to talk with?" _

**"I have friends, but I don't feel like talking to them now."**

_ "Isn't that sad, stranger?" _

**"It is."**

_ "Why don't you see a therapist like I told you before and leave me alone." _

**"Why do I need a therapist when I have you?"**

_ "That was actually smooth, but no. Seriously, you need therapy." _

**"And why do I need therapy? I'm fine."**

_ "You're not. Who the fuck calls random strangers in a bathroom stall and asks them if they know how to get rid of a boner? Abnormal people." _

**"So, I'm abnormal?"**

_ "I don't know, you tell me, stranger. Did you call a random stranger while being in the toilet a few days ago?" _

**"Yes, I did. Only because the bathroom stall told me to."**

_ "See? You listened to a fucking bathroom stall. You really need therapy." _

**"Anyways, how can we be strangers when I know your name, Louis?"**

_ "Don't change the subject, stranger." _

**"I'm not. You can't really be a stranger to someone if they know your name and vice versa."**

_ "Well, I still don't know yours." _

**"It's-"**

_ "I don't want to know. Keep it for yourself." _

**"You're mean."**

_ "I know, stranger." _

**"So, did you kill your best friend? What was his name again?"**

_ "I actually did. I took Liam's TV remote control and now he can't watch his favourite show. Since we're neighbours, I can easily turn on and off his TV. The other day, he called me and screamed through his phone that there was a ghost in his apartment who took his remote and is now playing with his TV. I never laughed so fucking hard in my life." _

**"Oh my god, Louis. That's the evilest thing I can imagine."**

_ "Thank you, stranger. This little piece of shit deserved it for writing my phone number on the bathroom stall of the gay bar and now some random lonely weirdo is talking to me because of him." _

**"So, I bet I'm the ‘some random lonely weirdo’ here."**

_ "Of course, you are!" _

**"Can you add ‘hot’ between ‘lonely’ and ‘weirdo’, please?"**

_ "I- no." _

**"Whatever. I know I'm hot."**

_ "And I don't care, stranger." _

**"Aw, I'm hurt, baby."**

_ "Stop calling me baby." _

**"Sure, whatever you say, love."**

_ "You- I'm hanging up now. Bye." _

**"No, don't go. I'll stop."**

_ "..." _

**"Annnnnnd, you hung up."**


	3. Chapter 3

**"Hi, Louis."**

_ "Seriously? I told you a thousand times to not call me. When are you going to listen to me, stranger?" _

**"Two times."**

_ "Pardon?" _

**"You said that only two times and now three."**

_ "I- are you serious?" _

**"Very serious."**

_ "It's not funny, stranger." _

**"Did I ever say it was?"**

_ "Listen, here, you little piece of shit. I-" _

**"You know what's actually funny? You calling me a piece of shit while I'm actually taking a shit."**

_ "What the fuck? I- You're disgusting. Where are you?" _

**"At the same famous bathroom stall."**

_ "You're again at that bar? It's only Monday." _

**"Mondays suck and there's no rule that says you can't get drunk on Monday."**

_ "Are you drunk, right now?" _

**"No, but I'll soon be."**

_ "Okay." _

**"Won't you ask me why I'm getting drunk on Monday?"**

_ "No. I do not care, stranger." _

**"You're mean."**

_ "I know." _

**"So, what are you doing?"**

_ "Wasting my time." _

**"How come?"**

_ "I'm talking to you, stranger." _

**"My feelings are hurt, baby."**

_ "I swear if you were standing in front of me, I would have kicked your arse. Don't call me baby." _

**"I would've loved to see you kicking my arse, Louis."**

_ "Whatever. I'm hanging up. Have a good time taking a crap and getting drunk, stranger." _

**"Thank you."**


	4. Chapter 4

_ "If you're calling me while taking a crap, then hang up the phone right now." _

**"Hello to you too, Louis. Don't worry, I'm in my room."**

_ "Why did you call me? Don't you have any better things to do, stranger?" _

**"I prefer talking to you rather than doing my stupid essay about the book we read in class."**

_ "What book?" _

**"The Alchemist by-"**

_ "Paulo Coelho. I read that book. It's amazing." _

**"It is, but not the essay."**

_ "So, what do you want me to do, stranger?" _

**"Distract me, please."**

_ "That would cost £100, sir." _

**"I like it."**

_ "What?" _

**"You calling me sir. It gave some BDSM vibes."**

_ "I didn't know you were this type of guy, stranger. In fact, I don't even know your name." _

**"It starts with an H and finishes with an Arry."**

_ "You do know that you're a complete idiot, Harry?" _

**"I may be an idiot, but I'm not stupid."**

_ "It's the same fucking thing, dumbass. And did you just quote Spencer from iCarly?" _

**"Yes, I just did and no, it's not. Stupid refers to a person's incapacity to understand a simple concept. An idiot acts upon their stupidity, in full embrace and with neither a second thought nor a shred of shame."**

_ "I- wow." _

**"You're amazed by my intelligence, aren't you? You're not the only one, though. Loads of people are too."**

_ "No, I'm amazed by the fact that you're idiotically stupid, stranger." _

**"Hey, that was not nice."**

_ "I never said I was nice, stranger." _

**"You know my name, so why do you keep calling me ‘stranger’?"**

_ "I like this term." _

**"And why is that?"**

_ "You're still a stranger to me, so am I to you." _

**"You're not. I don't talk to strangers while taking a crap in the bathroom stall of a gay bar. Twice. So, I think we can say that we're friends now."**

_ "Twice? When was the first time?" _

**"The first time I called you."**

_ "What the fuck? You were shitting and having a boner at the same time?" _

**"Erm... yeah."**

_ "I- you're something else, you know?" _

**"I don't know that, but I know I'm cute."**

_ "Whatever. Go write your essay." _

**"But I don't want to, baby."**

_ "Stop calling me baby." _

**"Okay, so what if I called you babe?"**

_ "No. Goodnight, Harry." _

**"You're no fun."**

_ "..." _

**"Goodnight, Louis."**


End file.
